SaxoManiac: October 2011

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Miss.

Today, a very simple day, I woke up at 7pm in the evening.

Why so late?

I've gotten drunk last night.

I've never drink that much before.

I told myself that I wont drink alcohol last time.

But now?

Actually I kinda fear alcohol, it makes me do things that I shouldn't.

I gives me illusion that weaken my friendship!

Somethings happen before this that makes me still can't get over it!

Because of this incident, I've learn that it's not easy to build a relation!

How did I do it last time?

Why can't I rebuild it?

I asked myself and I get no answer.

I miss moment where I share my stories in hand phone throughout the whole night.

I miss moment that you force me too sing for you.

I miss the moment that you don't allow me to this and that to make sure that I don't turn bad.

I miss the moment that when I wake up from a nap and sees you beside me.

I miss the moment waking you up from the bed and you're still sticking to the bed.

I miss the moment that you drive me out at midnight and go for a midnight movie.

I miss every single thing that had past.

All this can be considered memory!

I never hope that it will happen again because I know it takes a lot to makes us back together.

I've learn my lesson.

LET'S BREAKOUT, this two words started by me and I can't keep back them!

This two words had became our shadow, following us no matter what happen.

The reason we can't be together is because we can't overcome this shadow.

A scar is always a scar!

I hope, I wish yet I can't!
I love still!!!!!!

Really hope you take care yourself!

I know how weak you're although you always say you're tough!

I know you're not!

If I can fly there one day, I will surely fly there just to find you!

I know I will!

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Tarc Choral Exchange 2011!

Brother, Tze Hong visit KL!

Friday, October 28, 2011

Question mark for myself!

Four reason I find new relationship is very troublesome for me!

It's not easy to have a girl to accept my character. I always mix around with girls cause I find it nice to chat with girls. I can't make my partner feel safe until she really trust on me!
Due to my financial status,there's a lot of things that I can't give my partner, I couldn't bring her out for movies, shopping, travel or treat her eat what she wants. I feel useless when I can't do all this!
Fourth, I have transportation problem, I don't own a car. What I can do is always move around with legs or take bus. Which girls wants to do that?
Lastly, I'm a guy who don't know how to take care of myself, who wants to have such a useless guy to be in part of their life.

Haha, life is just so not cool. People may think or see that I live good, but I'm not! I'm just suffering every single fucking days! Who bothers? I miss those moment that my ex can understand my problem. and live on with me without complain. I missed out such a chance. I didn't want to grab back her for one reason, I'VE CHANGED, and I don't think I can give her any things that can make her feel good. I'm not up to the standard to have her. She belongs to a better one! Good luck in your SPM! You can do it! And all the best in your Japan trip!!^^ PEACE!